Hello. I'm new to the community, so I thought I'd post my story so to speak as a little introduction.
My name: Lynnie
His/Her name: Griff
I live: Georgia
He/She lives: Georgia now, in Florida when we met
My age: 22
His/Her age: 20
Distance: Was 532 miles
Together since: June 30, 2004
How we met: A now defunct forum
We get to see each other: When we were apart we would visit once or twice a year and talk online/on the phone daily.
Future plans: We got married :D That was our future plan, now we're just going to enjoy being married
Share some photos: I don't have any on this computer
Well, let's start from the beginning, shall we?
I was seventeen when I met Griff, he was fifteen. I was a member of a forum geared toward Pagans and people curious about Paganism. He had posted a question and I sent him an IM to give him the answer. We talked for a bit about that and then I had to go and I asked him if we could talk again sometime. He said he would add me to his buddy list and that was that.
As we talked more and more and I got to know him better, I realized he was very sweet, but somewhat down on himself. He had a long distance girlfriend who cheated on him constantly and while he knew what she was doing, he was afraid of being alone so he ignored it. His father was completely out of his life and his mother was verbally abusive to both him and his brothers and sister. He was living in a three bedroom house with his mom (who had no job and didn't plan on getting one anytime soon), his three brothers, his sister, his ex-stepdad, his grandmother, and his greatgrandmother. All the adults in the house were verbally abusive to all the kids, Griff being the oldest and therefore taking the brunt of it.
After we'd been talking for six months, my mom and I were talking one day and she asked if I thought he would be able to come and stay with us for a couple weeks in July as a sort of vacation away from his home life. I said I would ask and when I did his mother's exact response was, "Okay, whatever. I don't care." She didn't care if she met my mom, she didn't care about anything. Mom knew that we had been officially together for a few weeks, but she knew I knew the rules of the house. We drove down to Florida to pick him up (we lived in Georgia) and he came and stayed with us for two weeks. It was a GREAT two weeks; he finally had a chance to just relax and be himself and not constantly be worried about who was going to yell and insult him next. We were both really heartbroken when he had to go back home, but we knew we'd get through it until another visit was possible.
My mom felt like I was too attached to him and that we were too intimate during his visit. (We made out, but never had sex during that visit) She thought that I should break it off with someone who lived in another state and date someone who lived where we did. Obviously I felt differently about it and we fought for several years over my relationship. She started calling him lazy and worthless, just like his mom did, although not to his face. He dropped out of high school because he was getting attacked almost daily by bullies, but he got his GED and got a job. I don't know how that made him lazy or worthless in either his mom or my mom's eyes, but apparently it did. We were a couple from June 30, 2004 until December 30, 2006 when he finally moved in with me. He had wanted to wait a few months after turning eighteen before moving in with me so he could have some money saved up. Unfortunately, his brother (who has a lot of emotional problems, but living in that family, who wouldn't?) attacked him and while Griff did nothing wrong, his great-grandmother kicked him out of the house. His mother had abandoned her kids to live with her boyfriend and since the boyfriend didn't like Griff and wouldn't let him stay there, she chose him over her son. Griff had nowhere to go so he spent the money he had saved up on a bus ticket up to Georgia and he moved in on the 30th.
On December 13, 2007 we eloped and were married; my mother did not want me to marry him, despite the fact that he moved up here and got a job to help with his share of the bills. All he's ever done is try and take care of me and treat me like a queen. My mother wanted me to finish college before getting married, but that was not the path I wanted to take. Since we have been married she's finally admitted that she behaved very poorly during the time we dated and were engaged and that she does realize he IS a good man who takes very good care of me. We now live in an apartment with our dog, Bob and our cat, Normie.
It was hard to stay together the 2.5 years we were apart, but it was so worth it when we were finally able to be together for good. I think that long distance relationships, when done right, are often stronger than "traditional" relationships. You have to work much harder to keep the relationship going and alive and healthy when there's a distance and I know we're certainly better off because of it.
Anyhow, that's my long rambly introduction. Glad to be part of the community and I hope to make some friends out of it!
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